In part 1 of this psalm, we looked at the first two verses, today will will be focussing on v3-5. With the recollection that labouring, watching and toiling without God is all in vain;
A Song of Ascents. Of Solomon.
*1* Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labour in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain.
*2* It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives to his beloved sleep.
*3* Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.
*4* Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth.
*5* Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.
After the initial 2 verses showing us that working hard, worrying and looking out for others is pointless if God is not in it, Solomon then speaks about children. I think it is appropriate that Solomon tells us about the everyday things of life that we can worry about before he gets onto talking us about kids. Most of the time they are the aspect of life that parents worry about most! Therefore we need good practice at trusting God with the other things before we can even consider handing over our children to God. I think that is why this psalm is ordered that way - by first telling us that worrying about work, finances and safety is all in vain if God is there, before speaking into raising children. We have got to get our security in God in those things first before we can even entertain the thought that our children can be entrusted to God because that is much harder to do. We need the very real practice of trusting God. When we can trust God for our future, work, rest and protection rather than our own abilities and hard work, and we have seen Him be faithful in those, then we can begin to entertain the idea that He can be trusted with our children too. It is easy to say that we trust God with all of these things, but it is very difficult to actually do.
Verse 3 clearly tells us that children are a blessing. Sometimes we know that, other times we forget it! Children are in fact a, ‘heritage from the Lord’ - what an amazing statement! The word heritage is about having an ‘individual possession’ or an ‘allotted portion’. Children are ‘allotted’ to us ‘from the Lord’. They are not really ours, but we get to share life with them and guide them. Children are entrusted to us by God as a part of our life. We have part-ownership in our kids, not full ownership as we sometimes mistakenly believe. God has shown me this recently when things have been incredibly difficult, and i have told Him that i cannot do it. I cannot parent this child and i do not know what to do. God clearly told me 'give them to me then'. It was then i remembered this very thing; our children are not really ours. They were always God's first. I was battling, stressing and worrying (in vain!) when it is not fully my responsibility to do so, as these children are ‘allotted’ to us. We have part-ownership and we can go wrong and get stressed out when we forget and try to fix it all ourselves. That is what i was trying to do. I was praying and asking for guidance and at my wits end, so i was trusting God, but I wasn't handing over to Him. Does that make sense? Sometimes we can hold on too tight. We feel the full responsibility, but we were never meant to carry it by ourselves. It can be easy to pray and know that God is present even when things are falling apart, but then comes the reality that we need to give up trying to fix things and let God do it. That is where i was and it is scary and painful realising that you are not enough, but it gives God a chance to work and show what he can do. It is also a massive relief when you are able to emotionally do that. Remember that children are an, 'heritage from the Lord'. We can easily forget that and mistakenly believe that they are ours. Yet we share part-ownership. God is also invested and involved in the lives of our kids, and sometimes we need to let go and let Him influence, guide and guard.
‘Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth.’ A warrior knows how to use his arrows. He takes care of them, protects them and refines them before he sets them loose. As a parent or influential adult in a young person's life, you can invest in guiding and refining them. The purpose of an arrow is to fly. A warrior does all he can to ensure it flies straight and hits the mark. That is our responsibility too - Children will one day fly - what are you directing them to when they do?
One thing I often say as a parent is, “if my kids have got hold of who God is in their lives then I know they will be alright.” It doesn’t mean their lives will be easy or straight forward, but it does mean that their souls will be well. If our children know they have access to and can have a relationship with God, then they can handle life well. No matter what happens. So, it is my duty as a parent to do my best to model a good relationship with God and invite them into it and let them know they can have the same. To me, this is ensuring that the arrows fly well. Our children have purpose, meaning and a direction in life to follow. Our responsibility is to help, encourage and 'train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it' (proverbs 22:6). What great comfort that is.
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