what do you do when you are rejected and alone?

 Can you relate to feeling as David did in this psalm?

Psalm 69:1–36 (ESV):   

Save me, O God! 

For the waters have come up to my neck. 

2  I sink in deep mire, 

where there is no foothold; 

I have come into deep waters, 

and the flood sweeps over me. 

3  I am weary with my crying out; 

my throat is parched. 

My eyes grow dim 

with waiting for my God. 

4  More in number than the hairs of my head 

are those who hate me without cause; 

mighty are those who would destroy me, 

those who attack me with lies. 

What I did not steal 

must I now restore? 

5  O God, you know my folly; 

the wrongs I have done are not hidden from you. 

6  Let not those who hope in you be put to shame through me, 

O Lord God of hosts; 

let not those who seek you be brought to dishonour through me, 

O God of Israel. 

7  For it is for your sake that I have borne reproach, 

that dishonour has covered my face. 

8  I have become a stranger to my brothers, 

an alien to my mother’s sons. 

9  For zeal for your house has consumed me, 

and the reproaches of those who reproach you have fallen on me. 

10  When I wept and humbled my soul with fasting, 

it became my reproach. 

11  When I made sackcloth my clothing, 

I became a byword to them. 

12  I am the talk of those who sit in the gate, 

and the drunkards make songs about me. 

13  But as for me, my prayer is to you, O Lord. 

At an acceptable time, O God, 

in the abundance of your steadfast love answer me in your saving faithfulness. 

14  Deliver me 

from sinking in the mire; 

let me be delivered from my enemies 

and from the deep waters. 

15  Let not the flood sweep over me, 

or the deep swallow me up, 

or the pit close its mouth over me. 

16  Answer me, O Lord, for your steadfast love is good; 

according to your abundant mercy, turn to me. 

17  Hide not your face from your servant, 

for I am in distress; make haste to answer me. 

18  Draw near to my soul, redeem me; 

ransom me because of my enemies! 

19  You know my reproach, 

and my shame and my dishonour; 

my foes are all known to you. 

20  Reproaches have broken my heart, 

so that I am in despair. 

I looked for pity, but there was none, 

and for comforters, but I found none. 

21  They gave me poison for food, 

and for my thirst they gave me sour wine to drink. 

22  Let their own table before them become a snare; 

and when they are at peace, let it become a trap. 

23  Let their eyes be darkened, so that they cannot see, 

and make their loins tremble continually. 

24  Pour out your indignation upon them, 

and let your burning anger overtake them. 

25  May their camp be a desolation; 

let no one dwell in their tents. 

26  For they persecute him whom you have struck down, 

and they recount the pain of those you have wounded. 

27  Add to them punishment upon punishment; 

may they have no acquittal from you. 

28  Let them be blotted out of the book of the living; 

let them not be enrolled among the righteous. 

29  But I am afflicted and in pain; 

let your salvation, O God, set me on high! 

30  I will praise the name of God with a song; 

I will magnify him with thanksgiving. 

31  This will please the Lord more than an ox 

or a bull with horns and hoofs. 

32  When the humble see it they will be glad; 

you who seek God, let your hearts revive. 

33  For the Lord hears the needy 

and does not despise his own people who are prisoners. 

34  Let heaven and earth praise him, 

the seas and everything that moves in them. 

35  For God will save Zion 

and build up the cities of Judah, 

and people shall dwell there and possess it; 

36  the offspring of his servants shall inherit it, 

and those who love his name shall dwell in it. 

David feels like he is sinking, that God isn’t doing anything. He is worn out with emotional distress and hoarse with crying out to God about it. Yet none of this is because he has done anything wrong. He admits that he has messed up before (v19), yet this situation with his friends and family rejecting him is nothing to do with any error or sin on his side, but because of his wholehearted commitment to God (v9). Can you imagine that? 

Many people in the world can, we hear accounts about those who are persecuted for their faith. There are traumatic stories of imprisonment, restriction and death threats. People in other nations undergo these things because of their love for God and for living life God’s way. Even in our country I have heard of stories of christians making a right stand against an issue resulting in being rejected, disciplined, businesses in trouble, taken to court. All for doing things God’s way. I bet they felt something of what David felt. Feeling like they are in too deep, drowning, rejected, attacked. I have not experienced this level of persecution, yet I found it hard enough when I felt an outcast at work due to the faith I have. It was horrible, yet that was mild compared to level of persecution that David, and others have been through. The reality is, as people of God, we should expect some kind of push back, rejection and trouble. There is an enemy in the world that does not want to see God’s kingdom come, or His people succeed, and so Satan will do everything he can to cause suffering and difficulty. Are you prepared to suffer for your faith, and will you endure it?

David, even though he was taunted and rejected by many even his own family, was prepared to go through it because of his love for God. He was sold out for God and he suffered ridicule and rejection because of it, he acknowledged that these things, ‘have broken my heart, so that I am in despair’. David felt broken by the words and actions of others. David grieved for the lost relationships and felt like he was being engulfed in misery, drowning in a sea of grief because of the extent of his heartache. He was rejected and abandoned as those he loved and relied upon turned away from him, rejected and ridiculed him. He suffered. There was a great emotional response because he cared for these people, yet he knew his words and behaviour would not change because he loved God more. No wonder David felt so distraught, he knew the cause of the tension between himself and others was his love for God, and he couldn't change that, so he had to endure heartache and the hardship. When the faith you have effects the relationships you have developed, this will really test your commitment to God. You will have to choose between God and those you care about and it will lead to despair, heartbreak and loneliness, what will you do when you encounter such difficulties?

David cried out to God, and didn't stop crying out to Him! We can hear how David suffered, and we can look at our Saviour Jesus to see how he too suffered rejection, heartbreak, loneliness and pain because of loving and obeying God. Yet both David and Jesus continued to pursue God. They did not turn back, they asked for relief, for change, for help, but they chose to continue to suffer because they knew God is greater. They understood that His love, protection, guidance, comfort and strength are worth suffering for. They also knew that these things are available even in the midst of the turmoil. They spoke to God and trusted Him to help them through. After all, if everyone else has rejected you, who is left to help, encourage and strengthen you? 

David pours out his heart to God, ‘my prayer is to you, O Lord’. He depended on no-one else for salvation, rescue or relief. David knew who could save him from, ‘sinking in the mire’. So he held onto this hope, this faith that God’s ‘steadfast love is good’. That was enough for him to endure and have hope for a new day. Is that enough for you? 

Only God can sustain and protect you from drowning in despair and save you from the trial of rejection and hopelessness. His love is good and steadfast, and He supports and saves those He loves, so keep going and copy David. Allow yourself to feel the pain of radical obedience, ask God for help, and continue to worship. His love will carry you through every circumstance no matter how bitter or joyful. Rely on Him to, ‘draw near to my soul, redeem me’ and continue, no matter what to, ‘praise the name of God’. ‘For the Lord hears the needy and does not despise his own people who are prisoners.’ Trust in God, for man may reject you, but God will not and He will revive your heart (v32).

Pray, Trust, Wait

 Psalm 18 is almost exactly the same as the song recorded in Samuel 22, so this song of victory must be important. It is written by David and seems to be a reflection over a period of time as it tells of several victories he has experienced. So it appears that this song was written whilst David was contemplating his life and acknowledging the amazing challenges and breakthroughs that he had lived through. This psalm is not an account of a single victory, situation or battle, but an accumulation of victories that David acknowledges came about because he called, ‘upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised’. 

6  In my distress I called upon the Lord; 

to my God I cried for help. 

From his temple he heard my voice, 

and my cry to him reached his ears. 

Through his life, and particularly through the psalms it is well documented how David called, waited, cried out, and trusted God in his life. When trials came, when he was sick and afraid of dying, when he was confused and harassed and in times of despair he cried out to God, always acknowledging that God is in control then he waited. He waited, continuing to pray, cry out and trust God until the saw God breakthrough in ways he could not have envisaged. David uses this psalm to collate some of his experiences and to demonstrate his gratitude to God. Sometimes God rescued David, other times he radically transformed the situation, at others he protected David as he went through the troubled times, he trained David, guarded him and gave him supernatural strength and ability. All because David followed Him. David’s dedication to following God meant that he trusted God. He went through times of; loneliness, despair, confusion, fear, steadfastness and hope just like the rest of us do. Yet even when he found life impossible, was harassed and hounded, he still relied and trusted in God. His faith never wavered. David’s situation changed many times, and the trials came in different forms, and each time David poured out his heart and asked God to intervene. Then he waited for God to respond. David saw these victories and can testify to God’s almighty power and goodness because he cried, prayed, trusted and waited. Do you have stories like that? 

He sent from on high, he took me; 

he drew me out of many waters. 

17  He rescued me from my strong enemy 

and from those who hated me, 

for they were too mighty for me. 

18  They confronted me in the day of my calamity, 

but the Lord was my support. 

19  He brought me out into a broad place; 

he rescued me, because he delighted in me.”

David prayed, poured out his heart, waited, implored and gave thanks consistently throughout his life. He had a lot of trouble, some self-inflicted, but most not, and he always turned to God. He always acknowledged and sought God no matter what the situation was because he knew that God can always help. No matter how impossible, scary or how huge the circumstance, David knew that there was something God could do about it. So he asked Him to intervene. Then he waited. David would tell God what was going on, how he felt, what he needed, and then he would trust God to work it out because he understood that God cares about His people and that He works for the good of those that love Him. Sure, David got frustrated and desperate, and probably fed up of waiting, but he did wait. When you are fearful, overwhelmed and distressed do you call out to God and await his deliverance? Or do you call to God, get impatient and try to fix things yourself? If you want to know God as your rock, fortress and deliverer like David did, you need to leave the situation in His hands and not take it back! You can have a testimony like David’s, but do you have the faith in God required and the patience to wait? 

46  The Lord lives, and blessed be my rock, 

and exalted be the God of my salvation— 

47  the God who gave me vengeance 

and subdued peoples under me, 

48  who rescued me from my enemies; 

yes, you exalted me above those who rose against me; 

you delivered me from the man of violence. 

Are you awaiting the reward of God, or are you trying to build your own? Whatever you can do in any situation cannot compare to the breakthrough and extravagance of God, but you need to be patient and wait for it. If you want some of the experiences of favour and victory that you read about, then you need to pray and wait. You need to be prepared to be uncomfortable. Trusting God as David did is scary. It means that you are not trying to do life your way or try to fix things by your own hands, but praying and waiting in desperate hope. All the while acknowledging that God loves you and will bring rescue, support and freedom, it just is unlikely to happen in your time frame or the way you want or expect it to.  Sometimes you cannot do much to change the situation you are in, you can try, but it ends up causing you more stress and discomfort in the long run. What you can do is keep, ‘the ways of the Lord’. That is your responsibility. This shows that you really are a child of God and are serious about living life with Him. Then, in time, when God’s glorious victory has come, you can also say, ‘the Lord has rewarded me according to my righteousness’! What a testimony that would be!

21  For I have kept the ways of the Lord, 

and have not wickedly departed from my God. 

22  For all his rules were before me, 

and his statutes I did not put away from me. 

23  I was blameless before him, 

and I kept myself from my guilt. 

24  So the Lord has rewarded me according to my righteousness, 

according to the cleanness of my hands in his sight. 

David cried and called out to God many times in his life, and look at the life he had! There were many ups and downs, but what is David known for? Being a mighty king? A warrior? Brave? descendent of Jesus? A man after God’s heart? A worshipper? There are many admirable qualities we see in David, and they are all because he devoted his life, not to; a country, job role, family or material goods, but because he dedicated his life to following God no matter what. Will that be your testimony? 

1  I love you, O Lord, my strength. 

2  The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, 

my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, 

my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. 

3  I call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised, 

and I am saved from my enemies.