So, lets look at the personal qualities mentioned in this passage.
First off we have, Humility - a virtue by which a person knows themselves as they truly are. Often we can think of humility as considering ourselves as lesser than others. But this is not in the sense of putting yourself down or considering yourself lower than anyone/everyone else. It's a fair, just judgement of yourself. You are even allowed to say what you're good at. Humility is also the ability to recognise where we struggle or where we lack. We are designed to work in conjunction with others so it's alright to admit our weaknesses too.
I think everyone struggles with either of these two elements, we are either too hard on ourselves, or we think way too much of ourselves (pride). True humility is a balance, it's hard to get right, but we can get better. How can we work in unity with others, as it speaks about in the book of Ephesians, if we don't really know ourselves, beat ourselves up or are full of selfish pride?
Next up is; Gentleness. Mild mannered, soft, kind and sensitive. To be truly gentle, we need first to be humble. We will find it difficult to be truly gentle with others if we are harsh with or think too highly of ourselves.
Gentleness means that we each need to manage our temper. Learn to control your anger, get rid of resentment and tame our tongues so we are not harsh. We need to overcome the fierceness of our nature in order to be gentle. Gentleness requires a meekness, a willingness to listen and love with an open heart in order to provide a place of safety for others. No harsh words or outbursts, but a soft and sensitive leading to the greater love that we know is available in God.
After gentleness we have patience. Ahhh, patience or having forbearance as it's sometimes called. To tolerate problems, delay and even suffering without becoming annoyed.
ooohhhh, waiting - no one likes waiting, or problems or suffering, but it's necessary in order to 'walk worthy'.
In order to achieve this we have to overcome the fierceness of our nature to become gentle first. Then, with God's assistance we can gain some patience!
Why do we even need patience? Well, part of patience is waiting without complaint, and no-one likes a complainer (although we probably all know one!) In life we may have to wait for some things, we may have to suffer and we will have problems - so, how do you handle it?
Do you ask God to get you out asap? Or do you look for the lessons we are learning?
James 1:2 says, 'count it all joy my brothers when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have it's full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing'.
Part of the christian life is the striving to become more like the perfect saviour that we know and love, Jesus. So, let us persue patience, because it matters. It declares something to the world about who we are. Faith may be tested, but what do you want to stand for and learn from those experiences?
Bearing with one another in love. To do this effectively we need to be humble - laying aside ourselves, gentle - able to moderate ourselves, and full of patience - the ability to wait without anxiety or annoyance.
Bearing with one another in love. Let's face it, we all make mistakes. We all at some point rub each other up the wrong way and stuff up.
How do we get past that?
Well, first thing we need to do is to look at ourselves, make a fair judgement of how we are, how we feel and deal with what's happening within us. Then we can approach others with an attitude of gentleness and patience.
Learning to forgive and even overlook some things will be necessary. Watch how you speak about others, how do you talk about christians with different viewpoints or the person who lied or cheated you?
Do you weigh them with the same scales as you weigh yourself?
We all make mistakes, we all get things wrong, how would you like to be treated if you made the same mistakes?
Once we have understood and got these things, these wonderful qualities; humility, gentleness, patience and we are bearing one another in love, then we can maintain unity.
WOW!
We can live in harmony with one another, but we need to get these things in place first. If this is something we truly desire, to live in peace with others in order to demonstrate God's glory, then we have work to do!
Maybe you need to recognise and repent for some of the things you know are troubling you.
God is available, He'll listen to you and forgive you.
It may be that you need to go back and do this a few times, that's ok, God has unending patience - I know, He deals with me every day!
Gradually, if you trust God to help you make some changes in order to succeed in these qualities, He will be faithful and you will see how your character develops.
It may be that the things that really irritate you don't seem so bad after all, or you're able to manage the 'complainer' without feeling down.
Others around you may not see a radical change, but you will feel it, and you will begin to understand what it is to have peace.
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